Their Eyes are Upon Me… (Journal Entry #86)

Well, there was one lasting result of that horrible event with the Jareth brothers. (Besides the new roof and brand-new, expanded pantry the Jareth warriors built). The House of Jareth is… watching me. I don’t know how else to put it, but every time I leave my room, someone in Jareth green watches me.

Even the new Equa has eyed me. Suspiciously, I have to admit. But Faith—Jayi’s friend and the Jareth Equa’s cousin—says it’s because she thinks Joselyn Jareth is worried about me.

She has a soft spot for females who have been abducted, apparently. It’s the “thing” for Jareths, abductions. She was, Kindara was, Jierra was… Joselyn was yanked out of her own home, too. By Cormac. During the Taniss Four incident.

Apparently, Jareths are good at that.

Derrol Jareth is now missing, though. I have been told he might have a grudge against me.

I am to go nowhere without my guards.

Of course, I will go nowhere without my guards. I’m not crazy.

I… feel that I am being watched. More than just by Tol. Or the other two guards who rotate with him guarding me. I do not know them well, but they do not have harsh hearts. One, Wiac, is the brother of the Trianu warrior who carried me to the healer’s hall that day. He is so incredibly kind. He takes his duty very seriously, too. He is a bit more of a solemn male overall.

I hope his female, when he finally finds her, will be a more playful female. I suspect he needs that.

He guards me in the evening, when I am in my suite. I do not know what he does out in the hall between my room and the Boltier sisters, but he is always there when I need him. Well into the night, when a young male takes the overnight shift.

I shudder to think what this is costing Theo.

I cannot stay here forever, can I?

There… maybe I have been forgotten about again? It is my biggest nightmare now.

Weeks have passed, after all.

Jayi and her male are settled, Pin and hers have gone. The demon world awaited, after all. Alaun has written another book. Meyka has accompanied Ryrk, leaving his young sister with Rand Taniss to guard.

The Lycurgus Equa, Jayi’s cousin-by-marriage, gave birth yesterday. A male and female, healthy pups that everyone is rejoicing over. Jierra Jareth, now Rand Taniss’s mate, should deliver in mere days.

The entire hotel is terrified for her. She is a young Dardaptoan, and to carry twin Lupoiux… She most likely will not survive.

She is just a girl, a classmate of my Julea’s so long ago. I have wept for her family; for Kindara, her mother.

Why does the goddess allow this to happen? To take so many…

Everyone’s lives are continuing on. The new year came just a month ago.

My sisters saved enough money up to rent a room in the hotel—in the first floor east wing, where Dardaptoans could rent discounted rooms and enjoy the facilities. They had to be cautious with the money, but Riv told me that the Jareth warriors had saved us nearly two thousand dollars by forcing the suppliers to sell the materials for our roof at a fair cost. They had thought nothing of squeezing pennies out of seven orphaned females.

She was furious that the corruption had existed. That it took males fighting for our money for us to get it returned. 

I was not surprised. I have heard many things in Theo’s Judges’ Hall, after all. It is a dark world we live in now.

Probably because the goddess has forsaken us all.

Not that I have said that aloud to anyone other than Kellis, though.

I am not stupid.

Dardaptoans here can be so judgmental if your beliefs differ from theirs, after all.

Sometimes I fear what will happen to our people. Seriously fear it.

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