Invisible Jume. Please. (Journal Entry #20)

I’m still angry at Mak. And at Theo. The idea that innocent young females should pay for the sins of someone else—sins that occurred before they were even born—disgusts me.

I met Theo’s female today. Theo was escorting her around the hotel, giving her a tour. I suspected the young female with the strawberry-blond hair—a similar shade to Julea’s—and the bright-green eyes was just going along with Theo because she is afraid not to.

Giving him what he wants so that he doesn’t hurt her. 

Why wouldn’t that disgust a female to see? 

I’ve long thought females of our Kind have gotten a raw deal in a lot of ways. Yes, we are significantly smaller and weaker than the males; yes, we are far more susceptible to infections and blood loss and the cold. 

But we aren’t stupid. And we should have rights to our own future. No matter how Theo and the other lawmakers give lip service, saying we females have just as much power in our society as the males, I’m not so certain that I believe it. Not any longer.

I’ve seen too much to contradict that over the last fifty years.

Of course, most of the males in Dardanos that I come into contact with through my position with Theo are ancient.

Anachronistic, apparently.

Just because I’m a female doesn’t mean I automatically need a big strong warrior to protect me. At least, not all the time.

I’m almost seventy—not seventeen. My sisters and I have functioned just fine without a warrior to protect us for years now, after all. 

Our father was more farmer than fighter. He could fight, if needed, and I’ve seen him do that once when Lupoiux came too close to our farm when I was in my twenties and Ambrea was around my age. They wanted her. Well, they wanted her, Alaun, Kellis, me, and Riv. But they’d followed Ambrea home.

My father protected us. With help from some of our neighbors and our cousin Uruses. 

And, I have to admit, having a few warriors to help protect me when someone has hired Olietus Black to kill me isn’t something I’ll turn down.

But how long can that seriously last?

Mak and Jesix—the warrior who guards at night—can’t be assigned to follow me around forever. They are warriors. With important tasks. 

Far more important than watching every move I make.

I’m ready to go back to being invisible now.

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